Adventures in Masturbation, Part One

Part one of god only knows how many.  Men masturbate in ways that boggle the mind.

I debated, seriously debated, which masturbation story to open this series with.  After much deliberation, I decided to start with something that is mid-level gross only.

This is really not for the faint of heart.  And if you shudder at this, you might want to keep an eye for the the future edition I’ll mark as “extremely gross” and skip it.  Because OMFG.  Yeah.  It was…yeah.  There aren’t words for it.

This one comes from a man that identifies as straight but loves to suck cock.  We discussed this in the last post; this is common and I see what he means by that.  Ok.  He loves to suck cock, but whose cock?  I mean, you can’t just recruit friends (I suppose some people could, but most of us don’t have that relationship with our friends) and you don’t want to pick up cocks randomly.

(Side note: I’ve noticed that I’ve started considering a man’s penis to be a separate entity than the man himself.  It’s an odd trend, and I’m not sure how I feel about it.  What if you ended up liking one and not the other?  Loved the man, hated his penis?  Loved the penis, hated the man?  No telling what damage you could do to your personal life.  Fortunately, I’m in a good place right now, I love the man AND his penis…so all is well.  Movin’ on.)

His solution is to masturbate himself and collect the come into a small bowl, which he then drinks.  Yeah.  I know.  I’m not advocating it, it’s not for everyone, but for him, the drinking of the come is the big part of that, not the orgasm itself.

“Sometimes,” he confided, lowering his voice as if someone would overhear him, “I gather several loads in the bowl, two or three days worth, and have a feast.”

I pondered that for a split second and deferred to my default response when I’m thinking, that’s fucked up right there.

“That’s hot,” I said, enthusiastically.


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