Bam Bam Bam Bam

One of my oddest and most favorite calls was a sweet little guy, probably barely legal, who had clearly never had sex before and had no idea what phone sex should sound like.

“I’m slamming my cock into you,” he said, “Bam bam bam bam!”

Which goes down in history as the first time I had to repress laughter while working this job.  “Bam bam bam bam”?  I’ve had sex a few times in my life, and never but never has it sounded like that.

I was not sure how to respond to that, really.  I mean, on the one hand, I feel an obligation to give the poor child the orgasm he obviously needs.  On the other hand, how can I take him from “bam bam bam bam” to something sexy?

Fortunately, I have a standard spiel I use for all men, and it works beautifully nearly all of the time, and no, I’m not telling you what it is.  I have to make a living, too, you know.  Find your own spiel.

So I start my spiel, describing in mid-level detail how I would suck his cock, how I would play with his balls, and he responds, “Yeah, I’ll fuck your mouth with my dick.  Bam bam bam bam!”

At which point, I’ll admit it, I gave up.  Giving up means different things to different people in different situations.  In my job, giving up frequently means faking an orgasm.  Which is what I did for the little guy.  And every time he tossed me the “bam bam bam” bit I moaned louder, like I was feeling the increased intensity of his thrusts.

Virgins are cute.  The other thing that I love about virgin boys?  The come very quickly.  The entire encounter lasted less than 4 minutes.  I hope in some way I helped the child.  More than that, I hope he gets laid for real very soon, because seriously, I still laugh every time I think about that.

Bam bam bam bam.

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